IC Inbox

[whatisay]

This is Jason Compson. If you're calling for business, press one and you'll go through to my work phone. If this is something else, leave a message and I'll get to it eventually. If this is my mother, I'm going through a tunnel.

TEXT / VOICEMAIL / VIDEOMAIL

Comments

they're so dumb

[cigne]

what would happen if i said it was flirting? i'm wondering if i should be offended

you're not exactly practiced

Re: they're so dumb

[whatisay]

idk. might make things awkward.

I have natural charm

[cigne]

maybe it would be awkward because of how sucky you would be at flirting back

[whatisay]

wow you're rude

i can probably flirt just as well as you can

[cigne]

key word there is 'probably'

admit that i'm a better flirt and that my mustache is wonderful

[whatisay]

my mother raised me not to lie

[cigne]

she did a pretty bad job then

[whatisay]

nonsense. i'm the golden child

[cigne]

the golden child of lies and the king of liking my mustache

[Another selfie, this time with an ironic duckface. She has added a goatee.]

[whatisay]

the more you insist the more you seem desperate for my approval

mascara goes on your eyes not your chin!

[cigne]

excuse you it is my silky luscious facial hair and not mascara even a little bit, and i can't help how much you love it

[whatisay]

okay let me touch it

and smear it

[cigne]

you'll have to come upstairs and bring your own tiny comb if you would like to brush my mustache

[whatisay]

but my work is down here

[cigne]

ah but my mustache is up here

and i might have a slice of eta's cake

[whatisay]

when's your 15? mine's in an hour

[cigne]

i can do an hour. i don't have any meetings until later this afternoon, and my orders are already in

[whatisay]

you sound efficient. mine are in too but have to strategize with Stig so

you know

have to speak very slowly so might be running late

[cigne]

jolie and i meet on fridays, or whenever one of them comes back. which they haven't yet, so nothing to do there.

my mustache will be waiting

[whatisay]

joel must be getting so lonely

what with no one to be ungentlemanly to

[cigne]

he probably growls at his own reflection in the mirror for company

[whatisay]

he probably can't see through those eyebrows enough to realize it's an image of himself

jk not jk

[cigne]

i have to tell you what i found out about him, btw. did you know texas has a KING?

[whatisay]

i did not but i'm not surprised, half the Tributes come from barbarous worlds with royalty

[cigne]

yeah well apparently the king of texas hates him and threw him out